Let It Ride
Things have been going less than spectacularly lately, and the main piece of advice I have been given....just let it go and keeping plugging away. I thought about it. Should I let everything just slide off my back and continue on as though nothing is wrong and maybe eventually nothing will be?
As I drive to work each day, it's all the same...minus the insignificant changes of who cuts me off or what the weather is at the time. The season is changing over from Fall to Winter. The young turkeys are now in the pen at the turkey farm, waiting for the Thanksgiving week when they will all be taken out, never to be seen again. The cold weather is bringing on the time for the horses to wear their blankets and I dread the frozen buckets and the fact that I won't be able to ride my horse for months. I know that soon the Christmas season will come and I will worry about for whom I need to buy a gift and what to buy these people. New Year's Eve will come and though I would like to think I will have somewhere great to go with someone great, I fear it will be another year of falling asleep before the clock strikes midnight. So, as all these events arise, the same way they came about last year and the same way I believe they could arrive next year, I wonder....Do I want to continue with this trend?
If I let my feelings slide, if I push aside my desire for change, if I stifle my need to find my passion, then all these events will continue each year and eventually I will turn around and see a life wasted in mediocrity. I will look in the mirror and see someone who did what was expected; went to work each day, got a steady paycheck, went through the common experiences of life. Who will I be? A fake, an unhappy shell of a person. I don't want to be that person. I want to find that home of which I dream. I want to experience all the greatness the world has to offer. I want to meet all different types of people and learn more than what it is like to live the life of a white, middle-class woman.
I am not typical. I am not normal. I am passionate. I am emotional. I am intelligent. I want to be strong. I want to strive for my dreams. I want to be proud of who I am. I want to live up to my potential. I want to thrive.
As I drive to work each day, it's all the same...minus the insignificant changes of who cuts me off or what the weather is at the time. The season is changing over from Fall to Winter. The young turkeys are now in the pen at the turkey farm, waiting for the Thanksgiving week when they will all be taken out, never to be seen again. The cold weather is bringing on the time for the horses to wear their blankets and I dread the frozen buckets and the fact that I won't be able to ride my horse for months. I know that soon the Christmas season will come and I will worry about for whom I need to buy a gift and what to buy these people. New Year's Eve will come and though I would like to think I will have somewhere great to go with someone great, I fear it will be another year of falling asleep before the clock strikes midnight. So, as all these events arise, the same way they came about last year and the same way I believe they could arrive next year, I wonder....Do I want to continue with this trend?
If I let my feelings slide, if I push aside my desire for change, if I stifle my need to find my passion, then all these events will continue each year and eventually I will turn around and see a life wasted in mediocrity. I will look in the mirror and see someone who did what was expected; went to work each day, got a steady paycheck, went through the common experiences of life. Who will I be? A fake, an unhappy shell of a person. I don't want to be that person. I want to find that home of which I dream. I want to experience all the greatness the world has to offer. I want to meet all different types of people and learn more than what it is like to live the life of a white, middle-class woman.
I am not typical. I am not normal. I am passionate. I am emotional. I am intelligent. I want to be strong. I want to strive for my dreams. I want to be proud of who I am. I want to live up to my potential. I want to thrive.
posted by Cairde @ 9:13 PM
1 Comments:
At 7:31 PM,
ducki said…
You have to do what makes you happy and what lets you sleep at night. Everyone will always be there with advice. You need to sort through and decide what you will keep.
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